friendship on fire

I missed him today. And yesterday,too.

But I want to take this slow. No rush. No pressure. Because first and foremost, he is a friend. If all else fails, I will not harm this friendship.

I like him because he is a totally honest person, and by this very virtue I react as honestly. I've always felt that being too vocal about one's feelings is a dangerous thing to do, people take advantage of you or take you for granted knowing that you will always accept them no matter what they have done to you. But he has this sweet quality that I can't resist, it makes me want to bare my heart (not just my heart, actually.:-))

We always have an intelligent conversation, which is something that is very hard to have with a man. Men like to talk about sex, or about themselves but never really listens to you. Conversations and comfortable silences in between can be very seductive, a form of foreplay. It sets the mood for the things to come, a common ground for understanding each other.

I like him because I know he does not make promises that he can't keep. I don't, too. No false hopes for me. It takes courage not to speak of things we don't mean just because someone needs to hear it. And I like him that way.

We both respect the space we have set for ourselves. Relationships are like trees. They don't grow fully if they are too close. No judgments, no confrontations. Just easy loving and mutual affection.

He asked me once if I love him already, and I can't answer him right away. If I spoke of it, then I can never take it back, a point of no return.

Our friendship's volatile, I don't know where it's going, how far it's going. I burn but this is a fire I can't really show. Though I'm sure he knows.